But God...I don't have to do this.....

I came back to my sister’s house for an 'emergency' call after spending 3 weeks at my parents’ house. She has to go out of town for 9 days for her career-related program. She asked me to look after his 4 years old son, cook for her family,  and take care of her household.  Her husband is actually still in town, and they have a part-time nanny, but my sister insisted that  I have to come to her house. After all, I haven’t had any job yet. Yes, I’m still unemployed, and that is another story. Anyway, so, I took a long journey back here, 11 hours by bus, plus trapped in the seasonal Indonesian Idul Fitri traffic, when in fact I should've just continued my long holiday with my parents instead. 

I know it won’t be easy here. My nephew is an attention-seeker, violent-screamer, and rebellious kind of kid at this stage. Not all the time, but most of the time. Sometimes he is cute and nice. Well, I know it wasn’t 100% his fault. I don’t know how his parents had raised him.

His dad, my brother in law,  is a workaholic kind of dad. As long as I’m in his house, he will just leave his son with me whenever possible, so he is free to work at home. He is a lecturer. He likes to bring his works home. So, in other words, I'm a substitute player for a mum/nanny/housekeeper.

Daddy's girl

I always enjoy spending my time with my Dad. Yes, I’m my daddy’s girl. He loves to involve me in his activities; from gardening, feeding our fish in the pond, delivering fish to customers (my dad run a small business in fishery), doing a sudoku puzzle (random), to catching up with his old friends (though i don’t know them). He enjoyed my companion, and I enjoyed his. He also taught me how to drive and encourage me to be brave. When I did something wrong, he warned me. But if I did something right, he gladly praise me and said he was proud of me. Although I don’t have any job yet, my Dad was still proud of me and didn’t feel ashamed when he met his friends and introduced his ‘jobless’ daughter to them. It makes me pondering, my Dad just proud of me for who I am, not only for my achievements.

I’m so blessed I have this beautiful relationship with my earthly Dad. It helps me to have a great relationship with my heavenly Father as well. My earthly Dad is a great Dad, but God, my heavenly Father is even more... He is the best.

Lesson from babysitting my nephew - Obedience-

I spent my past 2 months babysitting my 4 and a half yrs old nephew. He is a smart, sweet, funny, and cute kid. But sometimes we (his parents and I) were made upset because of his rebellious attitude. Well, you know...he's just a kid. Whenever we told him not to, he always does the opposite. When he wants something, he just couldn't understand the meaning of "wait!". He wouldn't take "no" for an answer, and everything has to be fulfilled "now!" as he wishes. And of course, if we don't fulfill what he asks, he will cry, whine, scream, and probably throw his toys on us. When we explain the reason why we forbid him to do this and that, why we can't give him what he wants at the moment, and that it's all for his own sake, etc...., he just don't want to know.Well...., he's just a kid. However, we still love him no matter how he is. But of course it saddened us when he become a disobedient kid.

A Silent Lullaby

I was dreaming of your crystal-clear eyes

and the sweet smile from your tiny lips

I was looking forward to the day

when I finally hold your soft little hands

Can't wait to see the sparkle in your eyes

when I finally home and present you a Cinderella's dress,

brought from wonderland, miles away across the ocean.

I was dreaming of the day when you'll first call me aunty,

the sister of your father

then you will show me a dance you learn from school,

with a pretty ballerina dress

or sing me some songs you learn from your mom and dad

But God has chosen a better homeland for you

He has handpicked you to grow up in heaven

where there is no weeping, and no pain,

so you don't have to see injustice in this world

He, who has formed you in your mother's womb,

has chosen you to be His princess

and His mighty arms cover you in grace

Goodbye my dear,

though I've never seen you, I know you have my heart already

sleep tight..., I'll sing you a lullaby

-a lament for my niece-

7 Feb 2011 - 10 Feb 2011